It’s THAT SIMPLE!!įoreign Affairs? Sarah would stand tall against our enemies and stop terrorism in its tracks while keeping us the strongest nation in the world. Millions of Americans without healthcare? Sarah would shrink government while lowering costs, cutting taxes and creating jobs. Why does she look like she’ll taste good – and why is she so bad for you?:įIRST REASON: Sarah has an easy answer for EVERYTHING. Sarah is the political equivalent of marshmallow fluff, chocolate fudge, mac & cheese and cookie dough in a deep fryer. He reaches for something shiny because it’s shiny. Freud called him the “Id.” He doesn’t think. That little child is unconscious, and he seeks pleasure. To be precise, a little child inside you thinks it will taste good. Why would you eat a double bacon peanut butter egg and cheese burger with chipotle mayo? There are foods no rational human would knowingly ingest: the stuff listed on this website. (Both books are also available on bn.com and the Apple iBookstore.) I also recommend my first book, “Life is a Brief Opportunity for Joy” Please check out The People’s Therapist’s new book, “Way Worse Than Being A Dentist” To submit a question to Ask The People’s Therapist, please email it as text or a video to: I answer your question on the site, you’ll win a free session of psychotherapy with The People’s Therapist. On the other hand, I still feel hurt and upset when he loses patience with me, like I can’t rely on him during tough times.Īny thoughts or advice you can provide would be much appreciated. The problem is that, on the one hand, I’m starting to feel like the girl who cried wolf, since these periods of stress have happened regularly throughout our relationship. I know I can get moody and depressed during these times, but I’m up front with him about my state of mind, and I wish he could be more understanding. Our relationship tends to break down when I’m going through a period of heightened stress - writing my law school admissions essays, studying for finals at the end of each semester, and now, studying for the bar. I just got into another argument with my boyfriend of four years, and I’m feeling frustrated and upset. I’m a recent law school graduate studying for the bar exam. I received the following letter concerning the tricky business of maintaining a relationship: It leads to hurt feelings, resentment, anger and much unnecessary human misery. After working as a therapist with lawyers for a dozen years or so, I can say plenty of attorneys confuse their law firm with a parent figure, then relate to the firm like eager-to-please children. There were larger implications: I’d done the same thing at workplaces, including at my law firm, with disastrous results.Ī lot of lawyers make that mistake. I realized at that moment that I’d been like Newbie in my first group, too – searching for a father (for reasons I won’t bore you with), and drawing close to folks I might have been better off shying away from. And maybe Newbie wasn’t the only one there longing for a father figure – maybe Joe could have used a father figure, too. It was Joe’s right to be there, in that room, for himself, taking care of himself. He didn’t sign up to parent Newbie in that therapy group he was a member like anyone else, trying to make himself a bit less neurotic and maybe happier. More to the point, he didn’t want to be, to judge from his reaction. On the other hand, Joe’s statement was true – he wasn’t Newbie’s damn father. That was a chilly welcome, coming from a member of your new therapy group. To which, without a flicker of hesitation, Joe snapped under his breath (loud enough for everyone to hear): “I’m not your damn father.” Newbie opted for the “drawn to” half of the question, probably aiming to sound upbeat rather than scared, and gestured towards an older guy sitting beside him. He replied with some variant of “fine” and she probed further, asking if there was anyone in the room he felt drawn to, or perhaps shy to approach (this is typical group technique, designed to make the Newbie conscious of how he’s relating to others in the room.) (Unsettling-interaction-witnessing occurs in groups, where you spend time watching people “work their stuff out” and often “work your stuff out” at the same time.)Ī new group member, a twenty-something, showed up for his first session with us, and like new members sometimes do, he presented as quiet and a bit deferential – eager to fit in, and above all, to please.Įventually, the therapist leading the group went to Newbie directly, and asked how he was doing on his first day. Before I was a psychotherapist, I was a patient, and at some point in my time as a patient, I participated in group therapy, and witnessed an unsettling interaction.
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